Chuck Norris Jokes

Kept us sane and laughing during those dark days of studying. We'd exchange Chuck Norris facts outside the library during break time, and it made sure that everyone went back in with a smile on their face.

- Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
- Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
- Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
- There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
- Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
- The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
- Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse.. horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
- When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
- Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
- Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
- Chuck Norris doesn't shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
- On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
- Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
- Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
- Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.
- Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
- Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
- Chuck Norris doesn't believe in God. God believes in Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
- A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Dr. Mo

Its over.
I did it.
We all did.
Its over.

Number 3: Avaritia

Just thought I'd contribute to the cause. I've never liked the Bahrain Telecommunications Company. It has monopolized the entire communications sector since the start of its existence and caused me endless grief during my teenage years. Huge internet dialup bills made sure that my parents and I were at loggerheads for the majority of my adolescence.. although I now understand that it was Batelco's fault for charging so much while giving so damn little in return. Remember all the stolen passwords, kids? That was wrong.. but what could we do? The internet was a big new world back then, and all we wanted was to be connected.

Broadband in Bahrain is still slower than advertised, and more expensive than in other countries. Thankfully I haven't had to deal with Batelco for a good few years now, but I'm told that the service is snail-paced and unreliable. Eircom held a monopoly over the Irish communications sector for a very long time, but it had to fix up and look sharp recently with all the added competition. Cheaper prices (still not the cheapest) and faster connections.. working harder to value its customers because they can so easily move on to another service provider. That's still not the case in Bahrain, but I don't think it'll stay so for long.

Get with the program, Batelco.